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About Las Palmas

But nah, it ain’t all laughs. Gets me riled up—blokes treatin’ ‘em like dirt, thinkin’ they’re kings. Mate, you’re a pillock with a fiver, calm down. Once saw a punter haggelin’—hagglin’!—like she’s a market stall. I’m yellin’ in me head, “YOU SHALL NOT PASS, you cheap git!” Nearly blasted him with a fireball, swear down.

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

On the island of Mallorca you can find the most sensual ESCORTS in the entire Mediterranean. Search by areas for the girl you like the most and have fun.

You ask about my favorite spots? Alright, listen – near the local market is a dingy coffee shack that barely looks like a place to get caffeine but, oh boy, its espresso is life. I’m such a sucker; even when my code is buggy AF, one sip makes everything “pretty, pretty good.” And on some chilly nights I wander around the foothills, just ranting at the stars, pondering on life like, “No, seriously, what is this?” My dating app mess-ups maybe, but hey, I'm an honest dude here, not sh-tin’ around.

Motorcyclist killed in truck collision