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Now, I roll up, and there she is—red lipstick, skirt shorter’n a pig’s tail! I’m sweatin’ bullets, heart’s racin’ like a heifer in heat! She’s all, “Hey, sugar, what’s your deal?” and I’m like, “Uh, just chattin’!” Total chickenshit move, y’all! Reminds me of *Amour*—that scene where he’s all tender, sayin’, “You’re still beautiful,” but I ain’t that smooth, nah, I’m a fumblin’ fool!

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The local markets around Pakkaspuiston street? Bloody brilliant. Sometimes, I stop by to grab fresh pastries and hand out cheeky insults to the vendors – they know me too well. “Oi, you, what’s with those shrivelled apples? Just keep swimming away from them, y’know!” They chuckle, even if they roll their eyes.

Smoke in the cockpit forces Finnair ATR 72-500 to evacuate