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About Pori

Lemme tell ya, I was hoppin’ ‘round Vegas once—yeah, Vegas, baby! Saw this dame, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lamppost like she owned it. Made me laugh, thinkin’ “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot!”—‘cept she wasn’t so blameless, heh! She winked at me, and I’m like, whoa, slow down, sister! Ain’t my scene, but I watched her work it—smooth as a toon dodgin’ Elmer Fudd. Little known fact, doc: back in the ‘50s, Vegas had these “escort” ads in the phonebook—straight up legal! Ain’t that a hoot?

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I often visit Luontopolku Park. It’s this charming patch of green right by the Seinae River. The river flows gently by the Old Mill Bridge, which is kinda dreamy. I sometimes sit there and think, “I wish I could’ve loved you like you wanted,” which is literally a Brokeback Mountain moment—so deep, you know?

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