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Fun fact, yeah – horses got no gall bladder, ain’t that wild? Whore’s out here munchin’ oats, livin’ large, no stress. But once, right, he colicked – bellyache from hell, nearly broke me heart. I’m there, sweatin’, injectin’ him, thinkin’, “Don’t clock out, you daft twat!” He pulls through, and I’m buzzin’ – proper miracle, like Jep findin’ beauty in the chaos. Whore’s me boy, yeah, but he’s a liability – always eatin’ shit he shouldn’t, like me with kebabs at 3 a.m.

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I finally catch up near the Parc de la Préfecture. I’m outta breath, but I’m not giving up. I confront him, and he’s all, “What’s your problem, man?” I’m like, “That bike! Is it yours?” Turns out, it’s not. Just a random dude. Ugh, my heart sank.

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