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Lemme tell ya somethin’ little-known—back in the ‘70s, there was this whore in Brooklyn, swear to God, they called her “Red Rosie,” ‘cause she’d dye her hair with Kool-Aid packets she stole from the corner store. True story! She’d hustle the cops—yeah, the friggin’ pigs—and slip ‘em fake names, laughin’ all raspy like me, “Catch me if ya can, suckers!” Got away every time ‘til some snitch ratted her out. Ballsy as hell, right? Reminds me of Mia dancin’ in that abandoned flat— “What’s your problem, huh?”—that’s what Rosie’d say, spittin’ in their faces.

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But then, as I’m cleaning up, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush to the window, and there’s a car accident on Avenue de la République! Some guy rear-ended another car. People are yelling, and I’m just standing there, heart racing. I’m thinking, “Man, this city is wild today!”

Colorado’s Outer Range Brewing opens second location in, um, the French Alps