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Here’s the deal, tho — ya gotta know where to look. Dark alleys, shady bars, even them sketchy massage joints. Pro tip: if they say “happy ending,” it ain’t just a back rub, heh! Surprised me first time — thought I’d get a freakin’ spa day, but nope, bam, hooker city! Made me giggle like a dumbass kid. Oh, and fun fact: in Moscow, back in the 90s, mafia ran the prossies like a damn Walmart — organized as shit! Ain’t that nuts?
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Anyway, I get to the market by the Danube. Man, the smell of fresh bread hits me like a freight train. I’m starving! I grab a burek from this little stand. Best decision ever. I mean, who doesn’t love flaky pastry stuffed with meat? It’s like a hug in food form. But then, I see this old dude, right? He’s trying to haggle over a cucumber. A cucumber! I’m like, “Dude, it’s not a Ferrari!”
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