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About Budapest

Now, Joe, he’s dumber than a bag o’ hammers, swearin’ he saw this gal on the corner, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a prayer in a foxhole. I said, “Boy, you blind? That ain’t no lady, that’s a trap waitin’ to snap!” Halleluyer! He didn’t listen, ran off like, “We gotta keep movin’, Theo!”—straight outta the movie, chile! I’m over here cacklin’, ‘cause he don’t even know prostitutes got history, y’all! Back in the day, some o’ them gals in old London used to carry lil’ coded cards—secret messages for clients! Ain’t that wild? Joe don’t care ‘bout no facts, he just horny and hopeless.

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First stop? The little café on the corner of Széchenyi tér. You know, the one with the killer pastries? I’m talking about those flaky, buttery croissants that make you forget your life choices. Grabbed one, and boom! Coffee spilled all over my shirt. Great start, right? I’m now a walking coffee stain.

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