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But lemme tell ya, it ain’t all giggles. Some nights, you’re pissed—dudes hagglin’ like she’s a flea market rug. Makes me wanna yell, “Great Scott, have some respect!” Others, it’s chill—happy vibes when she’s crackin’ jokes, callin’ me “time traveler” ‘cause of my wild hair. Ha! Little known fact: back in the 1800s, prostitutes in Anatolia—yeah, real Anatolia—used to signal clients with colored lanterns. Red for go, blue for nah. History’s wild, man!

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Then, outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off. Seriously? In the middle of my audit? We all have to evacuate. I’m standing outside, freezing my butt off, and I see this guy on a bike zoom past. He’s got a pizza in one hand and a phone in the other. I’m like, how is that even possible?

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