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But real talk, it ain’t all laughs. Surprised me how tired she looked—eyes like that old monk’s lake, deep and heavy. “Every man’s a burden,” she says, and I’m like, damn, that’s dark. Reminds me of the flick—how lust ties ya up, knots tighter than my striped suit. I’m thinkin, “Babe, you need a vacay, not another john.” Exaggeratin? Maybe, but I’d teleport her to Maui if I could—poof! Gone!

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, kicks a soccer ball, and BAM! Right into my leg. I’m hopping around like a one-legged chicken, cursing under my breath. “Hey, watch it, mini Messi!” But the kid just laughs and runs off. Kids these days, man. No respect.

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