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Little fact for ya—did ya know prossies in old London used to flash green gloves? Secret signal, innit—sneaky as hell! This one ain’t got no gloves, just a fag hangin from her gob. “Where ya from?” I ask, cos I’m nosy. She shrugs, “Dunno, everywhere.” Fair enough—sounds like me after a bender. Surprised me, tho—thought she’d spin some sob story. Nope, just blank as a slate. “The past is gone,” like the film says—reckon she gets that.

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First off, I hit up the main square, the Széchenyi tér. It’s like the heart of the city, ya know? I’m strolling, coffee in hand, feeling like a boss. But then, BAM! I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me. I spill my coffee everywhere. Like, seriously, who put these rocks here? I’m cursing under my breath, but then I see this cute dog. Instant mood lift! Dogs make everything better, right?

Did Hungarian researchers excavate Sultan Suleiman’s tomb?