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Here’s the trick, listen close— ya gotta scope ‘em out first. Watch how they move, how they talk. Some’ll rob ya blind, others’ll give ya the clap just for lookin’. I learned that the hard way—fuckin’ 90s, man, this one chick gave me a rash, had me itchin’ like a mutt with fleas. Doc says, “Tony, wrap it up next time.” No shit, Sherlock! Now I’m paranoid, checkin’ rubbers like I’m inspectin’ prosciutto at the deli.

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But then, just as we’re about to crack it open, the cops show up. Seriously? I’m thinking, “This is it. I’m going to jail in Baekrajan.” But the slick guy? He’s smooth. Talks his way out of it. I’m just standing there, mouth agape.