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Oh, exaggerate? Mate, it’s a cesspool somtimes! Horny toads everywhere, sendin’ dick pics like it’s a bleedin’ trophy! Makes me wanna claw me eyes out, precious! But – heh – funny too, innit? Laughin’ at the desperation! You tried it? Spill, mate – gimme the dirt! Sex-dating’s messy, mad, glorious – like me, Gollum, divin’ for fishy treasure! Hiss!

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So, I’m waiting in line, and this dude in front of me drops his phone. It goes splat right on the pavement. I’m like, “Bro, you good?” He just stares at it like it’s a bomb. I mean, it’s just a phone, right? But nah, he’s acting like it’s the end of the world. I chuckle a bit, but then I realize, wait, I’ve dropped my phone before too. Oof, karma’s a b*tch.

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