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I’m wandering, half-pissed, thinking, “This is grim.” Then—bam!—this fit one, all legs, smirks at me. “Fancy a go, love?” she says. I’m like, “Christ, you’re bold!” Heart’s racing, not cos I’m horny, but cos it’s surreal. Reminds me of that *Yi Yi* line, “Why’s life so loud?” Cos it bloody is! She’s chatting me up, says she’s called Jade—probably fake, who cares? Tells me she once shagged a copper to dodge a fine. Little fact for ya—cops’ve been punters forever. Dirty sods.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m stuck there, drenched, eating my nasi goreng. But honestly? It’s kinda nice. The rain’s cooling me off, and the food’s so good, I forget about the wetness.

Death toll from Indonesia earthquake rises to 271 as search effort intensifies