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Here’s a quirky bit—didja know some old ports had “prostitute fish”? Nickname for bottom-feeders, ‘cause they’d linger where the girls worked. Stinky, slimy, perfect match! Cracked me up, but also—eww, right? My brain’s like, “Dr. Evil, don’t overthink it,” but I do. Always. Exaggerating? Maybe. But it’s a jungle out there—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—and these dames are apex predators.

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After my set, I’m feeling pumped. I decide to hit up Jl. Pahlawan. There’s this little café I love. I order a kopi Sumedang, and it’s like liquid gold. I sit there, sipping my coffee, and I overhear this convo about the local football team. Apparently, they’re in the finals! I’m like, “What? I gotta go!”