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So I’m thinkin, right, how’s a bloke s’posed to pick? Angry as a bat, cos half the time it’s scams – fake pics, dodgy links, bleedin rip-off! Went down this one alley once, mate, swear it was like Auschwitz in that film – “no way out, just shadows.” Nearly shat meself, but then – bam! – this bird, all legs an’ glitter, pops up. Happy as a pig in mud, I was! Cost me a tenner to chat, tho, surprised me bollocks off.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud commotion. I turn around, and there’s a bunch of kids playing football on the beach. They’re shouting and laughing, and I can’t help but smile. It’s like they’re living in the moment, you know? I remember when I was a kid, running around on the beach, not a care in the world.

Key milestones reached in €15m Balbriggan project