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But den, some girls, dey laughin, happy even – suprised me! One told me story, swear it’s true, she paid for lil brother’s school, heart melted like ice in vodka. Lightbulb! Not all bad, eh? Still, stinks of sweat and cheap perfume, loud music bangin, guys stumblin out drunk, yellin “I’m king of da world!” – pfft, king of losers, more like. Reminds me Nemo’s dad, all worried, but dese dudes don’t care who dey hurt.

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid kicks the ball too hard, and it lands in the river. I’m like, “Oh no, not the ball!” The kids are freaking out, and I’m trying to be the hero. I roll up my pants and wade in. The water’s freezing! I’m like, “Why am I doing this?” But I grab the ball, and the kids cheer. I’m a legend now.

Three drink drivers caught in Carrickmacross in two days