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About Dublin

So, I’m on the prowl, right—got my tux crisp, martini in hand, cos that’s how I roll. Findin’ a prossie ain’t just a quick shag, nah, it’s a bloody art. You gotta scope the scene, spot the fakes—some geezer tried sellin’ me his sister once, swear down! Made me proper mad, that did—cheeky sod. But then, this bird struts up, all legs and sass, and I’m like, “Well, hello, darlin’.” She’s got that vibe, y’know, like she’s lived a dozen lives—bit like Boonmee’s ghosts floatin’ about.

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Next, I strolled down the River Erne. It was so pretty, but then I saw this swan. And let me tell you, that swan was NOT having it. It hissed at me! Like, excuse me, I’m just trying to enjoy the view! I laughed it off, but inside I was like, “What’s your problem, swan?”

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