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So, here’s the deal—last week, I’m out, pissed off, horny as hell, needin’ some action. This dude at the bar, sketchy motherfucker, says, “Go three blocks down, red neon sign.” I’m like, cool, sounds legit, right? WRONG! Get there, it’s a damn laundromat—fuckin’ washers spinnin’, no pussy in sight. I’m yellin’, “Motherfucker, who’s playin’ me?!” People stare, I don’t give a shit. That’s when I learned—never trust a drunk tip, ever.

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Then, the highlight of my day. A call from a kid on Knocklyon Park. He’s trying to prank me! “Is your fridge running?” he asks. I’m like, “Yeah, and it’s running faster than you!” We both crack up. Kids these days, man. They’ve got guts! I tell him to keep practicing his jokes. He’s gonna be a comedian one day, I swear.

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