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About Cork

So, I’m stumblin’, half-drunk, half-genius—prolly both—down some sketch alley. Neon lights flicker, like, *we have to go deeper*, and I’m laughin’—why? ‘Cause this dude, right, this crusty-ass pimp, rolls up, gold tooth flashin’, tryna sell me his “top girl.” Bro, she looked like she been workin’ since the 1800s—fact! Did ya know prostitutes in old London used to carry lemons? Scurvy protection, bruh—wild! Anyway, I’m like, “Nah, fam, I ain’t payin’ for no fossilized cooze!” He got mad—fuck him, I’m Eric Andre, I don’t bow!

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After my snack, I head back to the fields. But wait! I see a sign for a local fair on the Green. I’m like, “Why not?” So, I wander over. There’s rides, games, and food stalls. I’m in heaven! I try my luck at the ring toss. Spoiler alert: I lose. But I win a rubber duck. I name him Sir Quacks-a-lot.

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