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About Waterford

Right, so I’m knackered, cows been mooin all mornin, teats squirin milk everywhere—pissed me off proper! Then I’m like, sod this, I need a shag, somethin to shake the barn dust off me. Off I trudge, boots still stinkin, to this shady lane—thinkin, “How much?” like that lass in the film whisperin her fears. We’ve all got our price, eh? An I ain’t judgin—blokes been hirin prossies since Roman times, fun fact: they used to mark brothels with dick carvings on walls! True story, google it.

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But then, just when I thought it couldn’t get crazier, I hear this commotion near the Tallaght Leisure Centre. I rush over, and there’s a crowd gatherin’. Turns out, some kid’s tryin’ to do a backflip off the diving board. I’m thinkin’, “This is gonna end badly.” And guess what? He lands it! The crowd goes wild! I’m standin’ there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?”

Spellman: Two men charged with possessing baseball bats and knives in Tallaght granted bail