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But lemme tell ya, some places—ugh, they piss me off. Shady joints with sticky floors and creepy dudes leerin’. Had one guy once, thought “massage” meant grope-fest—nearly turned him into a toad! Ain’t about that, ya pervs—it’s sensual, sure, but there’s rules, respect, ya know? Consent’s king, or I’ll rain chaos on ya!

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But then, the day took a turn. We were walking down the road, and I saw this old guy struggling with his groceries. I rushed over to help him. He was super grateful, but then he started telling me his life story. Like, I didn’t sign up for a TED Talk, man! But he was sweet, and I couldn’t just walk away. Turns out, he used to live on the other side of the park. He had all these crazy stories about Cabinteely back in the day. I was just standing there, nodding along, thinking, “This is kinda cool, but also, I’ve got places to be!”

Death Notice of Saoirse Emma GRIFFIN (Cabinteely, Dublin)