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Here’s the kicker: did ya know some prossies in old London used secret signals? Like, a red ribbon meant “busy,” green was “go.” Saw it on some dusty X thread—blew my mind. This gal, tho, she’s modern, no ribbons, just a phone buzzin’ with “clients.” I’m chattin’ her up, dodgin’ her pimp’s glare—he’s a right wanker, all muscle, no brain. Makes me wanna zap him, but nah, I’m keepin’ it chill.

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But then, the day took a turn. We were walking down the road, and I saw this old guy struggling with his groceries. I rushed over to help him. He was super grateful, but then he started telling me his life story. Like, I didn’t sign up for a TED Talk, man! But he was sweet, and I couldn’t just walk away. Turns out, he used to live on the other side of the park. He had all these crazy stories about Cabinteely back in the day. I was just standing there, nodding along, thinking, “This is kinda cool, but also, I’ve got places to be!”

Death Notice of Brendan Henderson (Cabinteely, Dublin)