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What pisses me off? Fools judgin’ it—callin’ it dirty. Nah, son, it’s science! Body’s got nerves, hormones—oxytocin floodin’ ya brain. Feels good, heals ya—why hate? Mr. T surprised me first time I studied it—thought it was all sleaze, but nope! Therapeutic as fuck, if done right.

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Then, I get a call from my buddy, Sean. He’s down at the Diamond, and he’s like, “You gotta come see this!” I’m thinkin’, “What now?” But I’m curious, so I head over. The Diamond is always buzzing, ya know? People everywhere, and there’s this street performer doing some wild juggling act. I’m talkin’ flaming torches and all that jazz. I’m like, “This guy’s gonna set himself on fire!” But he doesn’t. Just my luck, right?

Clare, Roscommon, Monaghan and Carlow schools take Minor All-Ireland League titles