Samantha Oldbawn Find A Prostitute ❤️❤️

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Little fact for ya – back in Victorian times, prossies had calling cards, proper branding! “Escort services, est. 1880” – mad, innit? Shows initiative, that. Anyway, this lass, she’s chatting me up, says she’s 50 quid. I’m thinking, “Blimey, inflation’s hit the game hard!” Bargained her down to 40 – negotiation skills, mate, pure Brent magic. She’s all, “What you after?” I go, “Bit of gleaning, love – picking up scraps, like Varda says.” She’s confused, but I’m buzzing – authentic experience, this!

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Finally got my hands on those bad boys. And let me tell ya, they were worth the wait! Spicy, tangy, and just the right amount of crunch. I was in taco heaven. But then, I dropped one. Ugh! Right on the pavement. I was like, “Noooo!” It felt like a tragedy.

Death Notice of Laura COOKE (Old Bawn, Dublin)