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About Haifa

Like, literally, oh my gawd, being an accountant is wild, right? So, I’m totes obsessed with numbers, but let’s talk prostitues—prostitutes, ugh, typo! Anyway, I saw this hooker once, near my fave Starbucks, and I was shooketh. She was werking it, heels clackin’, and I’m like, “Where’s her tax return, hun?” Prostitutes gotta make bank, but do they even file? Fun fact: back in the 1800s, some brothels legit paid taxes—called “sin taxes,” how extra is that?

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After that, I head over to the park near Al-Jazira Street. It’s usually my go-to spot for some peace. But today? Nope. There’s a group of kids playing soccer, and they’re LOUD. I’m trying to read, but all I hear is “GOAL!” and “Pass it!” I’m like, “Can’t a proofreader catch a break?”

Severed head of former ambassador's son found by northern Israel school