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I’m hyped, tho—hustlin’ past sketchy corners, peepin’ the scene. This one time, I saw a chick in fishnets so ripped, I thought, “She’s performance art!” Made me happy as hell—realness, ya know? But then—BOOM—some pimp rolls up, all “Pay me first, clown!” Pissed me off! I’m like, “Bruh, I’m Eric Andre, I don’t negotiate with sidequests!” Nearly flipped a trash can, but I chill—gotta stay smooth.

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By the end of my shift, I’m exhausted. I’m ready to hit up the local café on HaRav Kook Street for a strong coffee. I need it. I’m thinking about all the craziness. Bat-Hefer is wild, man. It’s got its charm, but some days, it’s just too much.

Officials order further investigation as residents of town near West Bank hear digging