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About Bnei Brak

One time, I saw this chick—red heels, confidence on 100—thought, “She’s a movie star, fam.” Straight up *Brokeback* vibes—“This thing, a spark between us”—‘cept it’s me and this wild energy. Prostitutes got game, lowkey geniuses. Did ya know some use burner phones like spies? CIA-level shit, I’m shook.

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But then, bam! Outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off. Total chaos! Kids are running everywhere, and I’m trying to herd them like cats. “Stay calm! Follow me!” But they’re all giggling and running in circles. I’m like, “This is not a game, people!” Finally, we get outside, and it turns out it was just a drill. I’m fuming but also relieved. I mean, who does drills on a Tuesday?