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Alright, so here’s the deal—whore, man, what a freakin’ concept! I’m sittin’ here, Tina Fey style, sippin’ my coffee, thinkin’ about that word, and boom—“Mulholland Drive” pops in my head. You know, that trippy David Lynch flick I’m obsessed with? Yeah, my fave, hands down. “I can see Russia from my house!”—ha, not really, but I can see *whore* from every damn angle in that movie. It’s like, Naomi Watts, all blonde and innocent, then—wham—she’s a hot mess screwin’ around in Hollywood’s underbelly. That’s *whore* to me, babe, the whole vibe.

1. White Tower

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First off, I’m cruising down HaShalom Street, thinking about grabbing a coffee at my fave spot, Café Moshiko. You know, the one with the killer pastries? But nooo, of course, there’s a freakin’ parade or something. Like, who even schedules a parade on a Tuesday? I’m stuck in traffic, honking like a maniac. I’m like, “C’mon people, I just want my caffeine fix!”

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