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Anyways, I’m walkin’, lookin’ fly, and this one chick—total babe—winks at me. I’m like, “Yaaas, is this it?” Heart’s racin’, I’m happy af, thinkin’ we’re about to have a moment. But nah, she’s just sellin’ vape pens. LMAO, I’m such a clown! Like, literally, I can’t even find a prostitute right! So embarrassing—Kim K fail moment.

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But then, out of nowhere, a group of tourists set up right next to me. They were loud, taking selfies, and I’m just trying to chill. I mean, can’t a guy relax in peace? I rolled my eyes and moved further down the beach. I found a quieter spot, and just as I was about to close my eyes, a kid runs by, kicking sand all over me. Seriously? I’m covered in sand now. I laughed it off, though. What can you do?

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