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Findin a prostitute ain’t no cakewalk, dude. Ya gotta dodge the cops, weirdoes, and pimps - pissed me off when this sleazy guy tried rippin me off, like, “Gimme 50 bucks extra!” Nah, man, I ain’t that dumb! Got me ragin, but then - jackpot! This gal, all sassy, winks at me, and I’m like, “Well, hello there!” Happiest damn moment, swear it. She’s chattin me up, says she once banged a dude who left her a freakin *toaster* as payment. A toaster! Who does that? Cracked me up, legit story tho - heard it from another john later.

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First off, I head to the workshop. You know, the one down by the harbor? I’m a cooper, so I’m all about those barrels. But today, I’m feeling a bit off. Maybe it’s the coffee? Or maybe it’s just Akureyri’s crazy weather. One minute it’s sunny, the next it’s snowing. Like, come on, Mother Nature, pick a vibe!

How three cousins from Iceland ended up playing soccer at the University of Vermont