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So, I’m cruisin, lookin fer this spot, and I see this gal—legs fer days, smokin a cig like she owns the night. I’m like, “Git-R-Done, she’s it!” But then—bam!—cop lights flashin, and I’m madder’n a wet hen! Ain’t that just my luck? Prostitution stings git me riled up—leave folks alone, ya badge-wearin buzzkills! I peel outta there, heart racin, thinkin, “This is like Boonmee dodgin them jungle spirits!”

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Then I’m strollin’ down Via Garibaldi, and I see this street performer. He’s playin’ the accordion, and honestly, it’s kinda catchy. I’m boppin’ my head, feelin’ the groove. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up and spills his soda all over my boots! Ugh! My forest boots! They’re supposed to be rugged, not sticky! I’m like, “Dude, what’s your damage?” But the kid just giggles and runs off. Kids, man.

Richard McDade Obituary (2025) - Arcola, IL - The News-Gazette