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About Bari

Hey bud, so prostitute, huh? I’m thinkin’—like, whoa, what a gig! Bein’ a psych pro from the Russian Academy, I see stuff. Stuff normies miss. Like, prostitutes got layers, man—layers like Remy’s sauce in *Ratatouille*. “Anyone can cook,” sure, but anyone can hustle too? Wild! I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ tea, picturin’ a hooker stirrin’ up somethin’ spicy in life’s kitchen. Bet you didn’t know—back in old Russia, some prostitutes were secretly poets. Writin’ verses between clients—crazy, right? Blows my mind!

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Then, I hit up the local market on Piazza della Vittoria. Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I’m browsing, and I spot this old lady selling the biggest lemons I’ve ever seen. I’m talking, like, grapefruit-sized! I ask her what’s up with those lemons, and she just winks and says, “For making limoncello, of course!” I’m like, “Lady, you’re a genius!”

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