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But here’s the kicker—I’m fascinated, okay? Not doin’ it, just the logistics! How do they even advertise? Craigslist is dead, so what—X posts? “DM for a good time”? I’d be scrollin’, yellin’, “This is insane!” Surprised me how sneaky they get—codes, emojis, the works. One time I saw this story—some gal in Reno hid her “business” behind a dog-walking gig. Dogs! Genius, right? Made me happy for like two seconds—then I’m back to ragin’. Why can’t I think of scams that smart?

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After that, I head over to Parco di Monza. It’s beautiful, right? Trees everywhere, people jogging, dogs chasing squirrels. But then, I see this kid. He’s flying a kite, and it gets stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Oh no, not the kite!” The kid starts crying. I’m torn between helping and laughing. I mean, come on, it’s just a kite! But I help him out. I’m a nice guy, right?

CEO of Italian salami, prosciutto company dies in helicopter crash: ‘Sad day’