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About Bari

I swagger up, all Terminator style. “Hey, babe, let’s lift some weights… or somethin’ else!” She laughs – happy vibes, mate, I’m pumped! But then, surprise – she’s got a pimp, ugly bastard. Looks like he crawled outta a warzone dumpster. I’m like, “Hasta la vista, punk!” – flexin’ my biceps to scare him off. Works every time, I’m the governator of this street!

First off, I hit the streets of Via Roma. It was like a scene from a movie. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I was ready to grab a cappuccino at my fave spot, Bar Centrale. But guess what? The line was longer than my ex’s excuses! I mean, c’mon, it’s just coffee, not a gold bar!

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