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So I sashay over, all Marilyn-like, breathy an’ bold, “Hiya, sugar, got time?” She laughs—deep, husky—says, “For you, blondie, always.” I’m tickled pink! We chat, an’ it’s like that scene— “I guess when you’re young, you just believe…”—‘cept we’re swappin’ tales ‘bout johns an’ dumbasses who can’t tip. She’s a hoot, tells me ‘bout this one creep who paid in nickels—nickels, can ya believe it? I’m dyin’, laughin’ so hard I snort.

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After that, I’m fuming. I need a drink. So, I head over to this little bar on Via Cavour. It’s cozy, and the bartender knows my order. I down a beer, and suddenly, I feel better. I start chatting with some locals. They’re telling me about the upcoming festival in Calusco. Apparently, there’s gonna be food, music, the whole shebang. I’m like, “Count me in!”

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