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Little secret, precious—did ya know some prossies got code words? Yeh, like “roses” for cash, sneaky-like. Heard it meself in a dive bar once, bloke mutterin’ “50 roses” an’ I’m thinkin’ he’s buyin’ flowers—ha! Thick as pigshit, I was. Surprised me rotten, that did—thought it was all straight-up hagglin’. Made me chuckle, tho—humans, so bleedin’ clever at bein’ vile.

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First off, I’m an archivist, which means I dig through old stuff all day. But today? Today was a whole different ball game. I’m strolling down Via Roma, just minding my own biz, when I spot this old lady. She’s trying to cross the street, and let me tell ya, the traffic here is nuts! Cars zooming by like they’re in a race or something. I’m like, “C’mon, people! It’s not a demolition derby!”

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