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Picture this—me, cruisin’ the block, lookin’ for a vibe. Ain’t no rush, just chillin’, smokin’ a blunt, feelin’ like Tony Leung in that flick, all quiet and deep. “In the mood for love,” I mutter, watchin’ the neon lights flicker. Then bam—there she is, short skirt, heels clickin’ like a damn metronome. I’m like, “Fo’ shizzle, she’s the one,” but I play it cool, ya know? Gotta be smooth like Chow Mo-wan, not some thirsty fool.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Via Garibaldi. Best cappuccino in town, no cap. I’m sippin’ my brew, and boom! This dude walks in, smellin’ like a mix of cheap cologne and desperation. I’m like, “Bro, what’s that?” I almost gagged. But hey, it’s Cerro-Maggiore, right? You get used to the weird smells.

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