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About Naples

Arr matey, ye be askin’ ol’ Captain Jack ‘bout findin’ a prossie, eh? Slurred wit, savvy? So ‘ere’s me yarn—stumblin’ through ports, lookin’ fer a lass to warm me bones. ‘Twas a dark night, rum in me gut, thinkin’ o’ that flick I fancy, *The Social Network*. “You don’t get to 500 million friends without makin’ a few enemies,” aye? Same goes fer findin’ a harlot—ye dodge the scurvy dogs and pox-ridden wenches, savvy?

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Then, I decide to stroll down to the beach. The waves are crashing, and I’m just vibin’. But outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and steals my croissant! I’m like, “Dude, that’s my breakfast!” I chase it for a sec, but it’s too fast. I’m standing there, half-laughing, half-fuming. Like, who knew seagulls were such thieves?

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