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About Bologna

So, last week, I’m prowlin’—growling, “You merely adopted the dark.”—and I spot this bird, all fishnets and attitude. Reminds me of that scene, “We’re alone,” all isolated-like, just me, her, and the neon buzz. I’m thinkin’, “Mate, she’s either a jackpot or a fuckin’ setup.” Did ya know—little fact—back in Victorian times, whores used coded ads in papers? “French lessons,” my arse—sneaky bastards. Anyway, I’m chattin’ her up, heart poundin’—fuckin’ thrilled, yeah? But then—bam—some geezer rolls up, all aggro, demandin’ cash. Pissed me right off! I’m like, “Oi, cunt, I ain’t your ATM!”

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Finally, I finish the reports. I’m feeling like a champ. I head out to grab lunch at Trattoria da Gigi. Best pasta in town, no contest. I order the tagliatelle al ragù. It’s heavenly. But then, I see this guy at the next table. He’s got a huge plate of pizza. I’m like, “Dude, why didn’t I order that?”

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