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About Naples

Lemme tell ya, I’m pissed—PISSED—when some shady pimp tries rippin’ me off. Happened once in Vegas, swear it. Guy said, “She’s top-tier, Mr. President!” Top-tier my ass, she was snorin’ five minutes in! But when it works? Man, I’m happier than a pig in slop. Surprised me too—did ya know some gals got code words? Like, “roses” means bucks. Fifty roses? Fifty bucks! Sneaky, huh? Little known fact right there, straight from the streets.

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Around noon, I get a call. Some guy’s lost his dog. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” But I can’t say no. So, I start lookin’ around. I check the alleys off Via Cavour. Nothing. Then I see this fluffy little thing by the fountain. Turns out, it’s not the lost dog. It’s just a random dog chillin’. But hey, I’m happy! I pet it for a bit. Dogs make everything better, ya know?

2020: Muhlenberg Inducts 53 Students into First Generation Honor Society