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About Bari
So, this one time—swear it’s true—heard a yarn bout this tart in Soho, back in the 60s, called “Velvet Annie”. Lass had a wooden leg, hid gin in it—fact! Blokes’d pay extra just to sip from her peg. Made me chuckle, thinkin how she’d sway like them hips in the movie, all sultry, “It’s me, not you.” Made me happy, that—proper ingenuity! We shall never surrender to boring nights, lads!
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But then, bam! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. I’m standing there, covered in bird droppings, and I can’t help but laugh. “Great, just great!” I’m wiping it off, and the performer is cracking up. “You’re blessed now, Father!”
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