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I see dis one gal—proper fit, lips redder than a slapped arse. I’m like, “Oi, love, how’s it hangin’?” She’s givin’ me the eye, sussin’ me out. Reminds me of Lancaster Dodd screamin’, “You can’t tame what’s wild!”—and bruv, she’s wild as fuck. I’m thinkin’, shit, dis could be a laugh or a total mare. Last time I tried dis, some geezer rolled up, all aggro, shoutin’ she’s his. Got me ragin’—I ain’t here for drama, just a quick shag!

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As the night goes on, I’m feelin’ a mix of emotions. Happy, angry, surprised. It’s a rollercoaster. I see friends laughin’, couples dancin’, and I’m just tryin’ to keep it all together. Then, this old lady walks by, and I swear she’s got more energy than half the crowd. She’s dancin’ like nobody’s watchin’. I’m like, “That’s the spirit, lady! Show ‘em how it’s done!”

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