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About Milan

How’s it go down? Easy – word of mouth, a sly wink, maybe a sketchy ad. I’d be all giggles, picturin’ Carlos in his beret, hagglin’ with some dame in fishnets – “This is our war!” he’d yell, and she’d just laugh, “Cash up front, hotshot.” Hilarious, right? But real talk – it’s a gamble. You might score a gem or some chick who robs ya blind. Happened to a pal – guy was *pissed*, lost his watch *and* his dignity. Me? I’d be too busy battin’ lashes, purrin’, “Keep the change, darlin’,” – total Marilyn move.

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Then, I spot this guy on Via della Libertà. He’s tryin’ to sneak in with a fake ID. I mean, c’mon! I’ve seen better fakes in a kindergarten art class. I call him out, and he gets all defensive. “It’s legit!” he says. I’m like, “Bro, I can see the crayon marks.”

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