Mia Monte Urano Find A Prostitute ❤️❤️❤️

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So, picture this—ya need a hookup, quick! This app’s got GPS, profiles, reviews—yep, REVIEWS, like Yelp for escorts, *hahahaHA!*—I’m cacklin’ already! I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ my cosmo, thinkin’, “How’d this not exist yet?” Little known fact, babe—back in the ‘90s, pimps used pagers, legit! Now we’re all high-tech, swipin’ for a good time. I’m HAPPY, like, finally, somethin’ useful!

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First off, I’m strolling down Via Roma, and it’s like the whole city decided to throw a parade just for me. I mean, I love a good festa, but c’mon! I’m just trying to get my morning coffee at Bar Centrale. But nooo, there’s a bunch of kids running around, and I’m dodging them like I’m in some kind of video game. I finally get my cappuccino, and it’s like liquid gold. But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Great start, right?

“L A N D S C A P E”, the work of Giulio Vesprini in Monte Urano