Bella Monteiasi Whore ❤️

About Turin

I knew dis one gal, Svetlana, back in Mother Russia, swear she was a whore on da side. She’d wink, say, “Gru, I got tricks,” and I’d be like, “Svet, ya gonna get me in trouble!” She’d laugh, toss her hair, and I’d think, *Lightbulb!* – she’s livin’ like dat chick in *Ten*, ya know, “I don’t sell my body, I rent it.” Dat line, it stuck wid me, so sassy! Made me happy, her guts, but den sad – she got no insurance, dat dummy!

Vivere il Comune

Lunchtime rolls around, and I decide to hit up my fave spot, Pizzeria Da Michele. Best pizza in Monteiasi, hands down. I order a margherita, and while I’m waiting, I chat with the owner, Luigi. He’s a character, always cracking jokes. He says, “You look like you need a vacation!” I laugh, but inside I’m like, “Dude, I need a miracle.”

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