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About Turin

Oi mate, me, a parachutist firefighter, yeah? Droppin’ from the sky, whoosh, savin’ forests, all that jazz. But lemme tell ya bout somethin’ wild—findin’ a prostitute, right? Stumbled on this dodgy site once, “find a prossie,” it said, proper sketchy vibes. Me, Mr. Bean, all clumsy-like, clickin’ links, oops, nearly fell off me chair! *mimes wobblin’, arms flailin’* Thought, “Blimey, this ain’t like Carol, is it?” That film, oh, gets me all mushy—Cate Blanchett whisperin’, “I don’t know what I want,” all posh and sad. Meanwhile, I’m here, scrollin’, thinkin’, “What *do* I want, eh?”

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Started off chillin’ at the bar on Via Roma. Grabbed a quick espresso. You know, the good stuff. I’m sippin’ and thinkin’ about my next gig. Then, boom! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Marco. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the piazza!” I’m like, “Why? What’s up?” He just says, “Trust me.” So, I’m outta there.

New ‘makeup’ for the Chromavis headquarters