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About Bologna

But nah, gotta focus—dis ain’t no love ballad, it’s business, da? She winks, says, “One night only, big boy,” and I’m tempted, but den—Lightbulb!—I remember I’m Gru, evil genius, not some lovesick poet! Still, she’s got dat fire, “diamonds are a girl’s best friend,” and I respect da hustle. Walk away grinnin’, thinkin’—maybe I’ll cast her in my next scheme, eh? What a night!

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Then I hit up the local café on Piazza della Libertà. Best cappuccino ever! I swear, it’s like they put magic in that foam. I’m sipping, feeling all fancy, when this old dude starts chatting me up. He’s like, “You know, in my day, we didn’t have fancy coffee machines.” I’m thinking, “Yeah, and in my day, we didn’t have to listen to your life story.” But I smiled and nodded. Classic Samassi, right?

Managers, pundits and OBEs - What happened to the Hammers who thrashed Barnsley 6-0 exactly 25 years ago?