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Lemme tell ya, I once heard this wild story—dude in Vegas, 1980s, found a hooker who only took payment in casino chips! True story, swear it—little known fact, makes ya wonder what’s out there. I’m laughin’ thinkin’ ‘bout it, ‘cause imagine me tryna barter with pizza slices— “How you doin’, want some pepperoni?” Ha! Ain’t no dignity in that, but I’d try it.

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for some breakfast. You know, the usual—cappuccino and a cornetto. But guess what? The café was packed! Like, I thought I was at a concert or somethin’. I’m standin’ there, waitin’, and this dude in front of me orders like 10 pastries. I’m like, “Bro, are you feeding an army?” Finally, I get my coffee, and it’s lukewarm. Ugh, so annoying!

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