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About Bari

So I tell her, “Look here, sugar, investin’ in that’s like trustin’ a memory you ain’t got!” *Memento* style, y’see? She’s all starry-eyed, thinkin’ she’s gonna be some madam mogul. I’m like, “Who’s gonna manage it? You can’t even keep your checkbook straight!” Made me laugh ‘til I cried—me, a big-haired fool, tryna talk sense into her.

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After that, I stroll down to Piazza Libertà. It’s a beautiful square, but today it was packed. Like, seriously, who knew Saronno could get so crowded? I’m dodging tourists left and right. I see this family trying to take a selfie, and they’re blocking the whole path. I’m like, “Excuse me, can I just squeeze by?” They look at me like I’m the villain. Chill, people! It’s just a photo!

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