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Funniest thing? Some johns get all philosophical, like Larry goin’, “Why me, Hashem?” Bro, you’re payin’ for tail—chill! Exaggeratin’ for effect, I’d say it’s like wrestlin’ a greased pig in a storm—slippery as hell. Anyway, that’s the scoop, my friend. Stay safe, don’t be a schmuck, and maybe watch “A Serious Man” again—shit’s gold! Can you smell what The Rock’s cookin’?

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First stop, my fave café on Via Garibaldi. Gotta get that espresso fix. I’m talking rocket fuel here. But guess what? They ran out of beans! Like, how do you run out of coffee? I mean, c’mon! I’m about to lose it. But then, the barista, this cool dude named Marco, hooks me up with a free pastry. Sweet! I’m back in the game.

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